Your Second Act.

Intermission

Intermission. 

It’s the pause in the play where you take a few minutes, stretch, have some refreshment and gear yourself up for Act Two. Maybe you review what happened in the first act. Maybe you speculate on what’s going to happen in the second act. Maybe you just take a breath, relax and enjoy the company of the people near you for ten minutes. If you are an actor, it is a breather where you can make adjustments: change costume, change circumstances, change motivation and change tactics.

In life, we all have events that can throw us into intermission; life-changers which create a scene where we must pause, reflect, and figure out how we’re going to start over.  Things like divorce, death of a loved one, losing a job, relocating, the last child moving away or an unforeseen illness can all send us reeling backstage to regroup. Our heads spin with questions: “How did this happen?” “Why did it happen to me?” “Why now?” and most commonly “WHAT now?” “How do I change costume, change circumstances, change motivation and change tactics?” We become stuck and fearful. Some of us stay in intermission for months, or years. 

Fear not, help is on the way! This Blog is meant to help you custom design your life after intermission. To give you strategies and tools to start over, whatever your circumstances, however dramatic your first act may have been; to make you, not just a bit player, but the author, director and star of your Second Act.

I want to hear from you! 

• What BIG EVENT threw you into Intermission? 
• How are you stuck? What information would help?
• Let your story of stuckded-ness and recovery inspire other Second Actors!
  

Intermission is over. 

So go forth, with a little boldness, a little sass and a lot of courage and let your Second Act begin! 
Curtain up! 
Lights up! 
Action!

Say "Yes".

NONNA SAYS: "YES!" 
(reposted from Feb 2012) 


It's all Connected

So my latest venture involves people who are working on their “second act”. This is not necessarily a chronological age thing; sometimes it’s an event, rather than a birthday, that makes people completely transform their lives. For women, a second act is sort of hard-wired, biologically, with the onset of menopause. Not that I know anything about that. I’m in that fun phase known as perimenopause. (Why does no one warn you about THAT particular sleigh ride to hell?) My body doesn’t even feel like mine most of the time.

That said – I am truly looking forward to menopause. Yay for menopause! Bring on the ‘pause! Close down the baby factory! I am done having the babies.

I have passed the baby-having responsibilities on to my son. He is now in charge of baby-making (at least until my daughter finishes law school). He’s rather good at it, I must say.

Exhibit A:

 Cue the “awwwwww”.

That’s my granddaughter, Marley. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened. She’s three now and she has opinions. I love that about her. She also has different reactions when she hears she’s coming to my house. “Nonna’s house? I like candy.” -or- “Nonna’s house? I want juice.”  Because she knows, beyond all doubt, that “Nonna says ‘yes’. All the time.”

Saying Yes

So in the hodge-podge soup stirring around in my brain, all these things have been steeping. Second act… no kids at home… “Nonna says yes.”…

And I realized that Marley is on to something.

Nonna does say ‘yes’.  Sometimes to the distress of those around her who are a bit more cautious.

And when I say “yes” to things, Providence moves.

Here are some things I’ve said “yes” to, in the last year or so, that may seem odd to some:

This is Nonna saying “yes” to a dolphin swim.

This is Nonna saying “yes” to a howler monkey in the Costa Rican rainforest. The photo is blurry because I took it while flying by on a zip-line, 100 feet up in the canopy. Yes.

This is Nonna saying “yes” to fronting a classic rock band in a local radio station’s contest. (We were in the top four, out of over 1000 bands)

This is Nonna saying “yes” to running around onstage in lingerie in a cabaret produced by a production company she is proud to have helped get off the ground. 

This is Nonna saying “yes” to running Warrior Dash last year with my friend Christine AKA “Team Sexy Old Broads”. I am fully going to do it again in June, this time with some 40-somethings and some 20-somethings AKA “Team Cougars and Cubs”. (Update- Did it!! Bettered my time!)

And this is Nonna saying “yes’ to not only falling in love, but receiving love, after being terrified of it for 17 years.  I finally got out of my own way. Go fig. 

Intention and Allowing

Here’s the best part, for those of you who are starting your “Second Act”, be it chronological or transformational: None of the adventures listed above cost me scads of money. I don’t have scads of money. I’m an artist for Pete’s sake.

I just said “yes”.

It’s about intending to do something (in my case, have adventures), then taking the smallest of steps in the direction of that intention and lastly being open to it showing up however it shows up. Because quite frankly, it never shows up the way you think it will, or even the way you would like. So you have to let go of the “how” and just keep your focus on the end result. See it. Make it as real in your inner vision as you can. And then release your attachment to outcome. Just surrender and allow it to show up however the Universe sends it to you. You’ll be astonished. I promise.

It really boils down to these steps:

1. See it.
2. Ask for it.
3. Act on it.
4. Get out of the way.
5. Say yes. All the time